STUFF

When we came into this world, we didn't have any STUFF, but we came naked and were a little angry about being disturbed and taken from such a nice warm place. Now our parents knew we were not going to have any STUFF, so they bought us some STUFF and put it in a special room to hold our STUFF. As we grew older, we got a lot more STUFF and needed dressers and closets and places to store our STUFF. Then we got older, we got a lot more STUFF. When we went to school we needed to get school STUFF, and now had at least two places to keep our STUFF. Sometimes, if our STUFF got broken, we would get new STUFF. When we got to be teenagers, we got jobs and had money so we could get more STUFF, and we got a lot of STUFF!! Some of our STUFF, by that time was old, too small, or broken and so we got rid of some STUFF, but quickly replaced it with more STUFF. Then we got married and brought our STUFF together with another person's STUFF and go a lot more STUFF.
As I grew older, I got better and better jobs and promotions, and boy, could I buy stuff! I got cars and boats and lake cabins and more places to put STUFF. When I retired from the office, the gang at work gave me STUFF to remember them by. As I grew older, my house and cabin at the lake were filled with STUFF, but it seemed I could always find room for more STUFF. Oh, I had some of the most beautiful STUFF and I even used banks and things to store some of the STUFF. I had red STUFF, and green STUFF and big STUFF and small STUFF. I had STUFF in the garage and bedrooms, the living and dining rooms, and lots of places. I gave my kids STUFF and then got more STUFF. My kids and even their kids gave me more STUFF and we found lots of occasions to celebrate by giving even more STUFF. Then one day, much to my surprise, I died and I didn't have any more STUFF!!

By Geo. Carlin